When you can’t stop worrying about your relationship, it’s hard to focus on anything else. It’s hard to engage with your partner fully, too. How can you enjoy being with them when you’re distracted by all of the what-ifs? Just staying in the moment may be a challenge.

It may be difficult to make plans for the future, manage disagreements or make decisions together when you second-guess yourself and your partner. Your anxiety can seep into other relationships in your life, too. You might have concerns about your partner’s family, mutual friends or others.

You may fear being betrayed or left, when your partner is faithful or planning a future with you. Anxiety can lead you to be distrustful and unhappy in a healthy relationship. You shouldn’t have to struggle with these feelings.

You can find ways to ease your anxiety by working with a professional. Many people see therapists for relationship anxiety. To find out more about therapy with Lightfully, read answers to commonly asked questions here.

How can we help ease your anxiety about your relationship?

It’s easy to think that the solution for your relationship anxiety has to come from within your relationship. Perhaps you want your partner to reassure you, avoid doing things that worry you or prioritize soothing your anxiety. However, trying to manage your relationship anxiety this way can inadvertently reinforce it by validating it. It can strain a relationship, too.

Instead, you can work through your thoughts and feelings with a clinician. A licensed clinical therapist can:

• Identify causes of relationship anxiety

Relationship anxiety may stem from relationship difficulties like communication problems, attachment differences or mismatched expectations. However, relationship anxiety can also arise even when there are no major problems in the relationship.

It may have a basis in past relationships, family dynamics or other parts of your life. You can develop a better understanding of your anxiety by working with a therapist, and understanding a problem is the first step to solving it.

• Treat underlying mental health concerns

The next step may be taking a look at other factors that contribute to your anxiety. These may be related to an underlying mental health condition, like an anxiety disorder. Other conditions can also cause relationship anxiety — for example, borderline personality disorder can create an intense fear of rejection or abandonment. ADHD can be associated with rejection sensitivity.

A trauma-related condition like PTSD can heighten your anxiety, especially if the trauma happened in a romantic relationship or within your childhood home. It can lead to hypervigilance, a constant awareness and surveillance for possible threats. Even when you know that you are safe with your partner, you may feel the need to stay alert, protect yourself or seek reassurance.

• Provide comprehensive support

You and your therapist can build a comprehensive understanding of your relationship anxiety over time. Armed with that information, you can begin to combat your anxiety. Your therapist might provide treatment with cognitive behavioral therapy, dialectical behavioral therapy or another technique.

At Lightfully, our licensed clinical therapists use a person-centered and evidence-based model for personalized treatment plans. Additionally, you can work with a psychiatrist, participate in family therapy and get peer support in group sessions.

When you’re ready to take the first steps forward, you can reach out to Lightfully. You can get to the bottom of your relationship anxiety, mental health and related issues like attachment problems. Then, your therapist can use a person-centered approach to create a treatment plan with you. The plan can be defined clearly, so that you can see how much progress you are making easily and move toward detailed goals.

Find out about comprehensive virtual care

Lightfully offers a Virtual Partial Hospitalization Program (vPHP). Each week of this program includes five days of treatment, with 20 hours of programming spread across those days. You can:

• Meet a therapist every week
• Meet a psychiatrist (if you need medication management) each week
• Meet other people in treatment during four hours of group sessions per day
• Meet with a mental health professional and your family or partner every two weeks

With virtual care, you don’t have to travel to us. You can stay where you are more comfortable, and you don’t have to spend time on transportation, which makes for an easier fit in your daily routine.

Change is possible. When you’re ready to take the first step, reach out to our Admissions Concierge Team. We’ll take the next steps together, toward the fullest, brightest version of you.