Making friends as an adult can be difficult. Once you’ve been out of high school or college for several years, chances are you’ve had a few cycles of losing contact with your old friends and meeting new people. Staying connected on social media doesn’t always mean that you really maintain a connection. People move away, change jobs, and get preoccupied with life milestones like getting married and having children. 

After branching out to make new friends a few times, it can get pretty exhausting. What’s the point of making new friends if it doesn’t last?

There are plenty of reasons why friendship is good for your mental health and overall well-being. Adults need to feel cared for and accepted, and they need companionship just as much as children do. Friends help with all of these things, and they help keep your mind sharp and promote physical health into old age. Older adults who have an active social life are less likely to have dementia, heart disease and stroke.

Making new friends is an important life skill. The hardest part is finding new social activities where you’re bound to meet people you’ll like. Maybe you already have some people in your life who could become close friends if you just get to know each other a little better. It can also be very rewarding to reach out and reconnect with old friends. 

The following are seven unique benefits that show the value of adult friendships:

• Someone who cares — A friend is someone who genuinely wants to know how you’re doing and cares about your well-being. Knowing that someone cares about you can help you feel more secure and create a sense of belonging that we all need. 
• Companionship — Having someone to spend time with keeps loneliness at bay. It’s especially good to have friends who don’t make you feel like you need to filter yourself all the time. Good friends will be there to keep you company through good times and on your best and worst days.
• Someone to listen and listen to — As humans, we have a need to feel seen and heard. Talking through your troubles with another person can help make them seem less daunting. Friends can also help you learn to be a good listener and give you the opportunity to be there for someone else.
• Giving and receiving support — Everyone needs help from time to time, and friends can provide different kinds of support when you’re in need. There will inevitably be times when your friends will appreciate your help, too. The give-and-take in a friendship can help you feel like you matter. 
• Something to look forward to — Making plans with your friends or just seeing them on a regular basis gives you something to look forward to. This can help keep your hopes up and motivate you to keep moving forward when things are tough.
• A buddy to do things with — When you want to go to a concert, a sporting event or a movie you’re excited about, a good friend can go with you so you’re not alone. Of course, your friends’ interests won’t be exactly the same. This is one reason why it’s good to have more than one friend.
• Health benefits — There are many health benefits that come as a result of having close friends. Your likelihood of developing things like heart disease and dementia or having a stroke is much lower when you have good social relationships. Having friends helps motivate you to take better care of yourself, and it can even improve your sleep.

If you’ve been feeling a little closed off lately, it might be time to focus on building up some social connections or reach out and make some plans. It could be as simple as getting a cup of coffee, eating lunch with a co-worker or connecting on a virtual call with someone you haven’t seen in a while. Let your old friends know you’re thinking of them instead of just liking their Facebook posts! They’ll be glad you did. 

Sometimes, the worries and anxieties we anticipate when it comes to socializing are worse than the reality of what will happen. That said, to a person who has an anxiety disorder or a trauma-related disorder, these fears can seem very real and upsetting. If this is something you struggle with, building up your social life is a great goal to work on with a therapist. 

At Lightfully, we help our clients work on their relationships as well as skills to manage their thoughts, emotions and behaviors. Group therapy is an important part of treatment, so you get plenty of practice talking about your mental health and getting to know new people. If you have a mental health condition that’s getting in the way of your social life, one of our levels of care may be a good fit.

Do you have a condition that makes it hard to make new friends? We can help you explore your treatment options. Contact us today. Let’s take the next steps together.