Maintaining a positive mindset is kind of a chicken-or-the-egg situation. Negative experiences will create a negative mindset. However, there are a lot of self-help gurus on the internet who say you have the power to choose positive thoughts every single day. But is it really that simple?

Creating a positive frame of mind isn’t like flipping a switch. It’s something that takes deep reflection and daily effort. There isn’t one secret to it. There are many different strategies, and you’ll need to experiment with them until you find out what works for you. 

Try some of these tips to reset your frame of mind in the new year:

• Give yourself a clean slate — First, you have to commit to leaving behind the negativity. Call it “strategic forgetting.” You might write down all your negative thoughts and then burn the sheet of paper. Tell yourself everything up until this point was practice. Find a way to make the decision feel final and give yourself frequent reminders.
• Embrace beginner’s mind — Don’t jump to conclusions or assume you know how things will go. A beginner is motivated to try something new even though they might fail. In fact, they might expect to fail a few times. Keep the energy of your fresh start by practicing beginner’s mind.
• Focus on being, not doing — An obsession with productivity can have you focused on everything you haven’t done instead of appreciating what you have done. There will always be work to do. Your state of mind or being affects how much gets done. Choose to focus on being calm, present, assertive or engaged. You’ll get more done with less stress.
• Speak to yourself with compassion — Judgment and frustration toward yourself keep you stuck in a negative mindset. Try speaking to yourself with more compassion and curiosity instead. Again, give yourself plenty of reminders.
• Envision what you want your life to be like — It’s one thing to want to change your life. But what do you want that new life to look and feel like? Take some time to get relaxed and imagine what you want to be doing and how you want to feel a month from now. Six months from now. A year from today. See if that gives you a sense of direction.
• Narrow down your personal values — Positivity for its own sake isn’t the most inspiring philosophy on life. When you know your personal values and try to cultivate them in your life, you can gain a stronger sense of meaning and purpose.
• Set intentions, not resolutions — Resolutions can be challenging to maintain. Instead, set intentions for small things you can choose every day. Focus on outcomes and ways of being. Write them in present tense and put them where you’ll see them. “I’m making time for self-care. I choose to celebrate small wins.”
• Try affirmations — Affirmations are more present-oriented than intentions. They’re helpful for conjuring the feelings you want to have in the moment. Say them in the mirror when you’re getting ready in the morning. “I am enough. I’m capable. I’m worthy of love.”
• Build mastery — Saying these positive things to yourself can be hard when you don’t feel like you have much evidence. Identify some skills you can learn through practice. Spend time with them and let your progress give you confidence.
• Give yourself grace — Resolutions and strict, specific goals can backfire when you feel like you’ve failed. Perfection is also a recipe for self-loathing. Don’t get so focused on the results that you can’t appreciate your work. Let yourself be human.

Feeling inspired yet? It’s OK if it takes some time for that new mindset to sink in. Anticipating failure and negative consequences can put your nervous system on edge. This makes it hard to dream about the future or feel gratitude. Do some things to physically relax yourself before you focus on your mindset work. Make it a regular part of your routine to get really calm and reflect on your frame of mind.

Therapy sessions can be a great way to keep yourself accountable. A therapist can help you identify and understand your negative thoughts so you can start choosing more positive ways to speak to yourself. They can also help you set long-term goals and build up your self-confidence. Contact us with questions about treatment.

Want more insights on changing your mindset? Keep an eye out for the next blog in our “Frame of Mind Reset” series.