Losing a parent is one of the most difficult experiences a teen can face.Grief isn’t the same for everyone; for people of all ages, grief can manifest in many different ways. For teens, grief can be especially complex. Your teen may be experiencing profound grief for the first time in their life. They may not have the tools needed to process their feelings in a healthy way. Although losing a parent in childhood is not common, it does happen. Data shows that 4.3% of children ages 0-17 have lost at least one parent. Helping your child work through their grief can be difficult, especially when you’re grieving at the same time. Even so, your support can have a profound positive impact on your child.

When your teen is grieving, it’s important to approach them with empathy and understanding, especially when you’re likely trying to manage your own grief. Learning about some of the ways they might process their grief can be a good start. Understanding what your teen is going through can help you recognize their needs and provide needed guidance.

3 ways the grief of losing a parent can impact your teen

• Mood changes — Your teen may experience a lot of different emotions as they grieve. They may feel sadness, anger and guilt. These emotions can come in waves. Your teen may seem relatively content one day, then be very irritable the following day. Emotional turbulence is a common part of grief. However, it’s important to understand when your teen’s mood changes may be indicating a mental health disorder. Complicated grief is a mental health disorder that can develop during bereavement. Sometimes called prolonged grief, complicated grief occurs when someone experiences especially severe grief symptoms that last for more than six months. Someone experiencing complicated grief may not show any signs of improvement, even after grieving for months or years. Their symptoms may even become worse over time. If your teen is experiencing complicated grief, seeking professional treatment can be crucial to recovery.
• Social withdrawal — After losing a parent, your teen may pull away. They might seem to prefer solitude for a period of time. This could be a sign that your teen wants to process their emotions privately. If your teen is withdrawing from social life, it’s important to respect their space while still showing you care. You can let your teen know you’re there for them if they want to talk about what they’re thinking or how they’re feeling. If your teen doesn’t seem comfortable talking to you about what they’re going through, you can also offer to connect them with a therapist.
• Difficulty concentrating — Grief may cause your teen to lose focus. They may be preoccupied with thoughts centered around their loss. This can make it difficult for them to concentrate on daily tasks and responsibilities. If this difficulty concentrating persists over a long period, it may start to negatively affect your teen’s studies. Their grades may start to drop, and they may start to seem completely disinterested in school. Your teen may feel as if getting their assignments done is impossible because they can’t concentrate. If grief is clouding your teen’s focus, offering guidance can make a big difference. You can try helping your teen by guiding them through homework assignments or helping them stay on track with studying.

It’s also important to recognize potential signs of prolonged or complicated grief that may require immediate help, such as self-harm ideation or a significant decline in functioning.

Helpful coping mechanisms for grieving teens

Grief is a deeply personal process, and you may be dealing with your own emotions as you try to come to terms with the loss. However, there are some ways you can help your teen through it. By encouraging your teen to use helpful coping mechanisms, you can facilitate a healthy grieving journey. Some good coping mechanisms might include:

• Talking — Giving voice to pent-up thoughts and feelings can be a cathartic and validating experience. Opening up may help your teen process their emotions and find relief. As a parent or caregiver, you can encourage open communication at all times. Create a safe space where your teen can share without any fear of judgment. Let them know it’s OK to cry, vent or simply sit in silence. When your teen feels like you’re safe, they may be more likely to open up to you.
• Journaling — Journaling can be a powerful outlet for working through complicated thoughts and emotions. If you think your teen might benefit from this outlet, you can give them a journal. They may use this journal to jot down memories of their lost parent and express the feelings they don’t want to express out loud.
• Connecting with others — Social support can be crucial to mental health improvement. If your teen seems isolated in their grief, you can try to help them connect with others. This can be as simple as finding social clubs for them to join or connecting them with a grief support group. In some cases, the best option may be connecting your teen with a professional treatment provider.

Lightfully Teen can help your teen process their grief

Professional mental health support can be a vital part of working through grief. At Lightfully Teen, we’re committed to providing the support and individualized treatment each client needs. The framework of everything we do consists of evidence-based, clearly defined and compassionate whole-person-centered care.

Change is possible. If you think your teen may need professional assistance processing their grief, contact us. We’ll take the first steps together, toward the fullest, brightest version of your teen.