Finding people you can have fun with and whom you can also lean on during difficult times isn’t always easy, but it’s worth it when you find them. Friendships play a significant role in having a well-rounded lifestyle. Friends can provide you with a support system during difficult times, people to share memories with and a place of belonging.

However, a mental health condition like obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) can impact those friendships in more ways than you might think.

Mental health conditions are highly individual and personal to anyone who experiences their symptoms, and they can affect every facet of your life, including your relationships. 

OCD involves recurring, unwanted thoughts that cause anxiety, known as obsessions. They lead to completing repetitive rituals or routines, called compulsions. On the surface, these symptoms may seem like they only impact you, but they can actually affect your social life as well.

OCD can make it difficult to form and maintain friendships due to the following reasons:

• Time-consuming compulsions

When you have an obsessive thought, you have an impulse to complete a compulsion to alleviate the anxiety, as your brain makes you think something bad will happen if you don’t. But that relief is temporary, and the thought will occur again, making you repeat the compulsion. You can be caught in a loop for an extended period of time, with compulsions often taking up more than an hour of every day. Even if they take less time, they can still cause distress or impairment in daily life. 

When you’re completing compulsions, they can interfere with social plans by making you late. Or they can consume so much of your time and energy that you no longer can put that same effort into being social.

• Feelings of shame and embarrassment

Even though there’s nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to living with a mental health condition like OCD, it’s not uncommon for the symptoms to interfere with your confidence and how you see yourself. 

You may feel shame about your obsessions or embarrassment when you’re doing your compulsions. Those negative emotions can make you incorrectly feel like you’re unworthy of friendships or like you’re a burden, causing you to push others away.

• Avoidance of potentially triggering situations

If there’s a place, sound or circumstance that triggers your obsessions, you may try to avoid it to reduce the risk of unhelpful thoughts and compulsions. It’s possible that social opportunities may involve potentially triggering situations. If you avoid those opportunities, you’re also missing out on hanging with friends or meeting new ones. Examples can vary based on the OCD theme:

• Contamination OCD — Crowded spaces that could spread germs
• Perfectionism OCD — Unorganized store shelves
• Harm OCD — Riding a train when there’s a fear of pushing someone on the tracks
• Need for reassurance and accommodations

OCD can make you feel a continual need to get reassurance from others as a way to be sure that you didn’t make a mistake or that your fears aren’t based in reality. Excessively seeking reassurance can become emotionally exhausting for your friends, leading to frustration and a lack of patience.

Seeking reassurance is just one type of accommodation for OCD, meaning that other people are enabling your symptoms. All types of accommodations can strain a friendship over time, such as a friend helping you complete compulsions or taking over tasks that may be triggering for you. 

If you have trouble making or keeping friends due to OCD, it can further exacerbate anxiety by causing self-doubt and sometimes leading to social withdrawal or isolation. But with the proper treatment, you can address and alleviate the OCD emotional, mental and behavioral patterns that are impacting your social life.

Therapy is a pillar of OCD treatment. Talking to a therapist can help you gain control over your compulsions and learn to sit with the uncertainty of obsessions by recognizing that your fears are not based on fact. You might also be prescribed medications to reduce your symptoms on a day-to-day basis.

If you need more intensive help beyond outpatient therapy, Lightfully’s four levels of care can help you develop the tools you need to move along your mental health journey. They include:

• Residential Treatment
• Partial Hospitalization Program 
• Intensive Outpatient Program
• Virtual Services (vPHP/vIOP)

Every level of care consists of evidence-based, whole-person-centered care provided by deeply compassionate experts.

Change is possible. When you’re ready to take the first step, reach out to our Admissions Concierge Team. We’ll take the next steps together, toward the fullest, brightest version of you.