Every parent wants their children to grow up to be secure and confident adults with healthy relationships. However, when you look around at the adults in the world, it’s clear that this is easier said than done. Many parents either aren’t aware of how their behavior will affect their children or they don’t have the knowledge and resources to be as supportive as they’d like to be. Some outdated parenting approaches, while well intentioned, may also cause unintended harm.

Certain things like socioeconomic status and genetics are difficult or impossible to change. However, with the right resources and some loving care, many aspects of a parent’s behavior and the home environment can be adjusted. Awareness of mental health topics and access to mental health care are especially important for parents of teenagers.

In this blog post, we’ll outline eight ways parents can impact their teen’s mental health. 

8 ways parents can affect their teen’s mental health

Children’s brains start developing before they’re born, and they don’t stop until their mid- to late 20s. During and after puberty, a teen’s brain is particularly focused on processing emotions and rewards as well as understanding social dynamics and building relationships. Teens may not always agree with their parents in these areas of their lives, but they are very observant. It’s important for them to have good mentors and role models they can trust when they need help.

It’s not just a parent’s own mental health and their genetic profile that can impact their children during their teen years. Here’s a look at eight ways parents can influence their child’s life during their teen years and beyond:

• Mental health awareness — Many people don’t know how to recognize mental health symptoms, when to seek help, or what kinds of help are available. Because mental health conditions are still highly stigmatized, some parents don’t want to even consider the possibility that someone in their family might need help. Denial can be as damaging as mental health conditions themselves. There are plenty of free and accessible resources available online, like our blog and Mental Health America.
• Family structure and function — While single-parent homes and divorced families can be less financially secure and sometimes contribute to poor teen mental health, that’s not always the case. Any home environment with a lot of dysfunction and fighting can make a negative impact. At the same time, some divorced parents are able to co-parent with mutual respect, creating supportive and stable home environments. 
• Attentiveness — Whatever obstacles are in a parent’s life, their presence and attentiveness in their teen’s life are indispensable. Parents and teens should talk about what’s going on at school and in the community and work through challenges together. Most of all, rewarding good behavior and decision-making will make a lasting impact.
• Modeling behavior — The behavior teens observe in their parents is their first and most intimate encounter with what adult life is like. Their relationships with their parents in early childhood will shape what they expect from partners and loved ones throughout the rest of their lives. During their teen years, they’re perceptive of the ways their parents deal with challenges, how they participate in their community and what they prioritize in their lives.
• Parenting style — Each teen needs a different kind of support from their parents. However, the extremes of being too lenient, too overbearing, too enmeshed, too dismissive or too critical can all be damaging in their own ways. Striking a balance between making boundaries and norms of behavior clear and giving your teen some agency to live their own lives can be very challenging. It’s best to be forthcoming and honest about emotional topics and resist using shame to influence your teen’s behavior.
• Exposure to trauma — The more adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) a person has early in life, the more they develop a propensity for stress and a sensitivity to it. Parents can’t protect their children from all types of trauma, but they can do their best to minimize their exposure, especially at home.
• Generational trauma — A parent’s unhealed trauma can have a subtle but toxic impact on their children. For example, parents with relationship trauma may respond to insecurity in relationships by neglecting their own needs. Parents who grew up in poverty may respond to perceived scarcity by going to extremes to save money on every purchase. Children and teens will pick up on these cues and often re-create them.
• Genetics — Mental health conditions like depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder and others often occur in people with a genetic predisposition. Symptoms may start to show up during developmental stages in a person’s adolescent or teen years. While you can’t change your teen’s genetic makeup, you can do your best to care for your own mental health and help your teen get the education and treatment they need to manage any conditions they have. 

To make your best effort at raising your teen with good habits for mental wellness, the best place to start is with yourself. With an open mind, curiosity and some humility, you can try to see problems for what they really are and find effective solutions. Prioritize your own mental health and learn about any conditions your parents and relatives may have. Remember that creating mental wellness is an intentional process, and seek out resources to support a healthy home life.

At Lightfully Teen, we provide individualized treatments for teens with mental health conditions that affect their ability to function. We take a proactive approach to developing the life processes that support mental wellness through the teen and adult years. If your teen ever needs a higher level of mental health treatment, we’ll be here. 

Do you have questions about supporting your teen’s mental health? Please contact us. Let’s talk about how you can be there for your teen during their most challenging times.